ilove2playgames (ilove2playgames) wrote in girl_friends,

So I need friends...

Most people spend their lives trying to get close to people. I’m the complete opposite; I spend my life running away from people. I’m not too sure who I am or where I am going in life. Sometimes I’m completely happy with my life and other times I’m miserable. I don’t like being personal and trust is not something I allow much. I hate confrontation yet; bring it upon myself more often than not. I’m spontaneous. When I’m put in a situation I don’t feel comfy in or one that isn’t going my way I run away. I’m not talking leaving for a couple hours to regain my cool. I pack two military issue duffel bags & hop on a plane to my next destination. Sometimes I run home to mom & others it’s to the next sucker that’s fallen for my extreme personality. I want what I can’t have and get bored with what comes easy. I don’t like wasting energy on making a relationship work. I love sex, But not with the same person. I love my job but not the responsibility. I’m good at putting on shows. I’m a bitch. I can be the most kind-hearted loving person that’s walked into your life but I can become cold-hearted selfish bitch at the flip of a coin. I’m unreliable. There is nothing in this world that means more to me then my immediate family.

I’m sexual, opinionated, educated… I enjoy taboo things and despise consistency. I react because it’s politically incorrect. I’ve lied, I’ve cheated, I’ve been the other woman, I will manipulate, and I love playing games.

I currently reside in Maryland somewhere. I work in management for a thrift store. I have three people in this world that get the “real” me, who aren’t played with. That would be my mother, my baby sister, & my oldest brother. Almost everyone else is one head game after another, whatever it takes to keep me entertained.

I’m out of my element. I’ve been in a faithful relationship for a year. It started with me cheating on my boyfriend to hook up with him and him cheating on his girlfriend to hook up with me. I honestly don’t know how I’m still here. The only other relationship I’ve had that’s lasted this long was my marriage, and that’s because he was pretty stupid. Maybe it’s a mutual understanding.

He might be taking a job that involves a lot of traveling out of state. I think the faithful part of my bio will soon disappear. I enjoy sex and he can’t keep up. I have offers I will soon start to accept.

This is the life of a simple girl lost in a complicated world. My journal is the one place I won’t hold back.
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